Dead Horses

Riding a dead horse into the 21st Century

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that when you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount. In modern corporate America and government, however, a whole range of far more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

• Buying a stronger whip.
• Changing riders.
• Threatening the horse with termination.
• Appointing a committee to study the horse.
• Sending a Congressional delegation to see how other countries ride dead horses.
• Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.
• Reclassifying the dead horse as "living impaired."
• Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.
• Harnessing several dead horses together to increase the speed.
• Providing additional funding and/or training to increase the dead horse's performance.
• Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse's performance.
• Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overhead, and therefore contributes substantially more to the bottom line than do some other horses.
• Rewriting the minimum performance requirements for all horses.
• Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position.
• Keep reassessing the horse until it rises from the dead.

Author of this little gem is unknown.